synecdoche: can you imagine how terrified of manhattan you would be if your only knowledge of new york city was from episodes of law and order: svu? THIS IS MY MOTHER
Day 1: Weird things you do when you're alone
I have practice conversations with people. Usually people I know in real life. Sometimes it’s a practice fight, where I add to my arsenal of insults and truth bombs. Sometimes it’s practice flirting with people I hope to run into. And then sometimes it’s conversations and advice I think I would have with my future children. Soothing them through break ups, pragmatically...
bullshitnparty: something weird i do when im alone: sometimes i write my name in script with a different last name, as if im married and signing a check or important papers. I do this too
In the real world this isn't actually that...
But in my world where I like to have fun in college, this is kind of an issue. My freshman and sophomore years of college, the first day of greek week took place in freshman circle. Honestly, yes, it was a drunk hot mess, but in reality, we weren’t hurting anyone. Any parents or prospective students who walked by would have seen a bunch of college kids who are involved on campus...
Lost a follower
I know exactly who it was too.
why did it take me 22 years to discover that...
Sometimes, when I read the forum
I can’t help but be scathingly sarcastic. Everyone’s all up in their little worlds of “look at me I’m in fairy sorority land and social rules don’t apply to me because I’m in the magic secret club of privilege!” and I always feel compelled to remind everyone that actually they’re in the real world and they joined a club like any other club and need...
I really love that Phi Sigs have tumblrs now.
And that some are following me. I feel like my tumblr explains a lot about me. Also, I can blog about my ridiculous sorority.
My view on Sammi and Ronnie
giveintolovee: I think that Sammi and Ronnie had some rough times tonight, made me upset. When they were both crying, I was personally sitting there kind of sad. But they got back together, and it shows that they are truly in love, and will work hard so they wont fight again. ..But we all know they will Ronnie and Sammie’s relationship is actually abusive, toxic, and codependent. They...
fuckyeahcuteanimalss: (via YouTube - Sleeping Puppy Gets Bath From Kitty) SOOO CUTE
Have my wedding dress picked out
Wait what if
I got a Bad Decision Wednesday-themed paddle?
press play click on the video, and drag your mouse mind = blown ^^^^^^^!!!!
I will be my own valentine because I'm fucking...
oracularfires: fucking oath reblogged for .gif
My Biggest Regret Ever
not actively trying to seduce Dennis Nixon.
An Atheist Professor of Philosophy was speaking to...
Professor: You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, you believe in God?
Student: Absolutely, sir.
Professor: Is God good?
Professor: My brother died of cancer, even though he prayed to God to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn’t. How is God good, then? Hmm?
(Student was silent)
Professor: You can’t answer, can you? Let’s start again, young fella. Is God good?
Professor: Is Satan good?
Professor: Where does Satan come from?
Student: From.. God.
Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Professor: So who created evil?
(Student didn’t answer)
Professor: Is there sickness? Immortality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
Student: Yes, sir.
Professor: So, who created them?
(Student had no answer)
Professor: Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son.. have you ever seen God?
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your God.
Student: No, sir.
Professor: Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God, for that matter?
Student: No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
Professor: According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, Science says your God doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
Student: Nothing. I only have my Faith.
Professor: Yes, Faith. And that is the problem Science has.
Student: Professor, is there such a thing as Heat?
Student: And is there such a thing as Cold?
Student: No, sir, there isn’t.
(The Lecture Theatre became very quiet with this turn of events)
Student: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 Degrees below Zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of Heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
(There was a pon-drop silence in the Lecture Theatre)
Student: What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
Student: You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have Low Light, Normal Light, Bright Light, Flashing Light… But if you have No Light constantly, you have nothing and it’s called Darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, You would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student: Sir, my point is, your Philosophical Premise is flawed.
Professor: Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student: Sir, you are working on the Premise of Duality. You argue there is Life and then there is Death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is not the opposite of life, just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Professor: If you are referring to the Natural Evolutionary Process, yes of course, I do.
Student: Have you ever observed Evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going)
Student: Since no one has ever observed the Process of Evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a Scientist but a Preacher?
(The class was in uproar)
Student: Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
(The class broke out into laughter)
Student: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? .. No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable and Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures?
(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable)
Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on Faith, son.
Student: That is it, sir.. exactly! The link between man and God is Faith. That is all that keeps things alive and moving!
That student was Albert Einstein.
wow, this was really albert einstein? had no idea he if believed in anything at all. when stories become about real people don't they hit so much harder?
SO much agreement and love for this. I hope no one is offended by that.
"It's not faith if, if you use your eyes" comes to mind.
Albert Einstein was Jewish.
Idk if this was really Albert Einstein, or if it's just some made up story like the one about Mr. Rogers being a navy seal with tons of tattoos, but, cool story bro.
Also, Jews don't believe in the Devil or Hell.
Every time a tumblr I don't recognize reblogs one...
I’m always like “OMG YOU GUIZE I’M FAMOUS ON THE INTERNETS NOW!” but then I realize that they aren’t reblogging it from me, they’re reblogging it from Melissa
pluralisms asked: http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150332217885430&set=a.10150283845915430.538425.736760429&pid=16429569&id=736760429
dudes who peaked in high school volume one
dudes who peaked in high school volume one
I JUST WANT SOME DAMN KOOL AID
JHC Doesn’t anyone in this house want fruit punch more than that powdery iced tea nonsense we have?
those are some sweet glasses
Oh Richard Burroghs
You’re adorable and nerdy.
"we're like, eskimo making out right now"
oh she is not cute
ugh Tracy Dalton.
Raise your and if you're a huge tease
THIS GUY RIGHT HERE
WE BONDED OVER BLOWING SHIT UP